Sex

The Insecure Partner
July 15 200
Insecurity is no fun. It’s that nagging
feeling of angst and anxiety, of being
unsettled and worried. You feel helpless
and that you don’t measure up to a person
or situation, lacking a sense direction or
confidence in how to approach things.
Like in the initial stages of dating, a single
gay man’s insecurity might look
like…”Does he like me?” “Why hasn’t he
called me like he said he would?” “Will he
still be around even after we’ve had sex?”
These are pretty normal reactions; it
becomes insecurity when the person
becomes preoccupied and ruminates about
the outcome, personalizing it and putting
himself through a slow-torture of doubt
and “what-if” thinking that distracts him
from being centered and relaxed (more)

Dating For The 40+ Gay Man: 7 Steps
To Success
July 15 2007
Dating can be hard enough at times, but
the situation can be made that much more
challenging for those single gay men who
represent the age 40 and up crowd. In a
society where youth and beauty are highly
valued, many middle-aged men report
feeling segregated and unappreciated in
dating pools, making it difficult to meet
and sustain relationships with potential
dating prospects. (more)

Facing life after 40
Older gay men battle fears of
isolation, invisibility
July 30 2007
One night eight years ago, Tim Bergling,
a journalist and television producer, was in
an America Online “m4m” chat room. He
says he was just shooting the breeze, not
looking for an online hook up.

But when Bergling told a younger guy that
he was 36, the man instantly ended their
chat, “Too old. Bye,” he said. (more)

Q. Can men really experience
multiple orgasms?

A. In short, yes. But for men, it's
more of a technique than a genuine
capability.
July 18 2007
Here's how it works: All men reach
"ejaculatory inevitability" during the
process of sexual arousal, the point of no
return, in which they are going to orgasm
no matter what. But if a guy is very
self-aware and attuned to his level of
arousal, he can bring himself close to that
point and experience some of the
pleasurable involuntary contractions of
orgasm without fully climaxing...as long
as he doesn't ejaculate. These orgasmic
contractions can occur over and over,
almost continuously, until he ejaculates.
And then, his orgasm will be really
intense, due to the buildup of sexual
muscular tension.

Even though male multiple orgasms are
possible, it takes time and practice to
perfect the technique. But you can help
your guy become multiorgasmic — and
score major great-girlfriend points in the
process — by employing the "squeeze and
at ease" strategy (which suppresses his
urge to ejaculate) that I wrote about in an
earlier feature on premature ejaculation.

One word of warning: Some men who
practice climaxing without ejaculating
report a dissipation in erectile quality, or
even a total loss of erection. If it
happens, don't freak...it's temporary and
only occurs while trying this technique.

NEW
What You Should Know and What
You Should Look Out For
Jan 8 2008
Anal sex can be a pleasurable experience
for gay men, but there are a few things
you should know before having anal sex
and a few tips to help ease the pain.
(more)

Gay Dating Tactics: Your First-Date
Dos & Donts
Aug 4 2007
Although it's changing, we gay men have
few role models to emulate when it comes
to love and romance. There's no template
to follow and we were never taught how
to flirt with and date other men. There
are no rules, no structure, and no
guidance. How do two men join together
in the "courtship dance?" (more)